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Follow these tips to help get chzt talking to you about their worries. Show them you respect their intelligence and are curious about the choices they've made. If you do not pre-judge their behaviour as "stupid" or "wrong", they're more likely to open up and explain why their actions made sense to them.

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Follow these tips to help get them talking to you about their worries.

1. start with understanding, even when you don’t understand

Show them you respect their intelligence and are curious about the choices they've made. If you do not pre-judge their behaviour as "stupid" or "wrong", they're more likely to open up and explain why their actions made sense to them.

Try not to assume you know what's wrong Do not assume that you know what's wrong. Rather than asking "Are you being bullied? You do not seem your usual self, and I wondered what's going on with you at the moment? Is there anything I can help with?

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Be clear you want to help If you suspect your child is using drugs or drinking excessively, be gentle but direct. Ask them, and let them know that you'll help them through any of their difficulties. Be honest yourself Teenagers will criticise you if you do not follow your own advice. For example, "How does smoking weed make you feel the next day?

Remind them of what they're good at and what you like about them. This will give them wuth in other areas of their lives.

Information is empowering. Help them think of ways they can respond and cope.

Pick your battles with your teenager If they only ever hear nagging from you, they'll stop listening. Try not to react to angry outbursts Teenagers often hit out at the people they most love and trust, not because they hate you, but because they feel confused.

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They may just feel confused, angry, upset, lost or hormonal, and they do not know how to express it. Help your teenager feel safe Teenagers often worry that telling an adult will just make things worse. You need to be clear that you want to help them and will not do anything they do not want you to. This may be particularly important witth bullying.

Best ways to talk to teens

If your child opens up to you about bullying, explain that it is unacceptable. Help build up their confidence by reassuring them that you'll face the problem together. Ask your teenager the right questions Sometimes you'll find out more about wifh teenager if you ask open questions. If they have an eating disorder, for example, asking confrontational questions like "What did you eat for lunch?

Sticking to open questions such as "How are you? last reviewed: 17 July Next review due: 17 July